How to soften your human

We had such busy days lately… Adapting in a new environment isn’t easy. Humans keep changing the places where they keep stuff, e.g. the laptops, so we never know where to look for it. Let’s hope things will get back to normality asap because we have a lot of interesting things to share with you.

But today I’ll tell you all about softening your human. Because from time to time you need to get down to their level and pretend you enjoy the same weird stuff as they do in order to make them feel confident enough in you and let the whole house at your hand. Especially when one of your buddies (let’s not give names, just pretend we’re talking about one crazy white piggy with grey ears) chews important cords like those of the audio system and the human discovers it.

So, first thing first! You need to find out what your human really likes. With our female is easy – Kirk goes with her in the bedroom, cuddles in her lap and everything is fine. She loves us unconditionally again. But with the human male is more difficult: he has weird tastes and none of us was willing get down that much… Just to see what I’m talking about, he likes computer games, the ones with shooting and killing, not so much the veggies, beer and strange stupid/funny movies on YouTube. How can a Guinea Pig relate to something like this?

Last Saturday I felt it was high time to do something and pretend to bound a little with the human. So, I put on my look. I mean “the look”, the one that asks them to grab me and carry me around the house with them just because I’m cute. I ended up on the table. The human was sitting at the table. (I hope we’ve noticed the different prepositions in relation with the table.) And we shared a beer. Because beer is one of the things he likes most. After all, he moved to Belgium!

There are so many kinds of local brewed beers that one could spend an entire life trying to taste them all. But we shared a Chimay Bleu. He took the glass like a gentleman and I took the bottle like a man. No worries, I’ve just pretended to swipe and I took the pose for the camera. But they had no idea it was fake. How could I like something like that when I have fresh veggies in my room?!

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In the end, after the beer, the human forgot about the cord, Spock was still alive and I went back to my room with the feeling of a job well done.

 

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