Spock's opinions about humans, Spock's tales

Too hot and too much light!

We live in Belgium, a country where it rains a lot. But a lot! The winter here is just a longer fall. Actually, the whole year looks like an incredible long rainy season. Or at least this is what we heard from other furry creatures in the pet shop…

Until now we can honestly say that a winter as warm as a fall is no problem for us. Yeah, the humans which need to go out to buy vegies for us may have a problem, but we advise them to take an umbrella or a jacket with a hood. And, after all, they are not as fragile we are, so some rain won’t damage them irreparably.

But… With the spring & summer being as a fall, we really have an issue. Not because it was, but because it wasn’t! And we are living in an apartment where our official territory (the living room) faces south, so imagine that. Last year, in our first year of life on this Earth, we had to face 28° C and a lot of light coming through the windows. I have beautiful red eyes, but they kind of tend to hide when strong light is chasing them. So, I wheeked several times, the human female finally understood and bought curtains.  (As there is not much light usually, they were not needed…)

Than the heat knocked us out. The human female was not really understanding our signals and she kept putting the wood houses back in there “normal” position for two days or so. But, finally, after a small warning bite, she understood that we are trying to redecorate and to cool down a spot. Maybe for her 30° C in the room was a blessing, but not for us! So, after we tried several times without success to undress our furs (it is not possible, apparently, like in the case of humans), we decided to make a space protected by light and to remove also the sawdust from there. Of course, after the heat passed, we put everything in the right place.

Just check how good interior designers we are. 😀

guinea_pigs_tales_heat

This week-end it was summer all over again. We are not complaining, but we need to meet up and decide the measures to be taken if this continues. Anyhow, we’ll keep you posted.

Kiss you all,

Spock

P.S. I’ve got to run now! Run, Forest Spock, run!

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Spock's tales

Our purpose in life

This time I’m the philosopher! I’ve managed to discover by myself what the Guinea Pig’s purpose in life is, the whole meaning of our existence and the one of the existence of humans in our lives. I am so proud of myself and I want to share all this with you.

First of all, I’ve noticed that the human female gets happy every time I’m popcorning. And she even starts laughing when my popcorning comes together with some sawdust spreading all over the place. So I’ve trained myself and I became a master of spreading sawdust. Every evening when she does the cleaning of our private rooms, I popcorn and spread stuff around. Now, don’t imagine just two, three pieces or some hay, but imagine something like a rain of sawdust all over her, the couch and the surroundings of my room. Sometimes I amaze even myself with what I can do.

And, more surprisingly, the human males are not allowed to do this. If they would do something similar, I’m sure they would sleep on the porch, but only if they are lucky enough. Even more, they need to provide me with fresh hay, clean sawdust and food that can be carried around. But carefully, not to make a mess in the house…

So, she laughs when I do this and the humans are not allowed to do it. The only logical conclusion is that I was born to do this. Together with being a crazy scientist, of course. 😀  Also, apparently, I’m very good at it. Kirk can do it also pretty well, but because of his big butt he can’t really popcorn very high. But, still, he’s taking his duty very seriously also. And it hit me: we were meant to create disorder, to give people a purpose in life (cleaning after us).

How to do it? Simple! Be happy with your life and popcorn a lot. But a lot! And popcorn close to the margins of your private room, so all the sawdust can be spread outside it. When you are taking the usual walk in the house, chew every twigs tunnel you can find; spread the hay all over the place; pee and poo under the couches; find the celery and turn upside down the vase. Just do it! And the humans will be happy.  If you don’t believe me, just check below. We have pictures proving that there is nothing wrong in doing it. I mean, we I am still here, writing this story… The first one is from the time we were sharing everything, and the second one is very recent and proving that I still master the technique.

guinea_pigs_tales_kirk_spock_messguinea_pigs_tales_spock_messWe strongly recommed you to try this at home for the happines of your humans companions!

Kirk's tales

How Guinea Pigs can use humans

As you already have noticed, we live with some humans. I think almost every Guinea Pig in the world lives close to a human… And this is not because we can’t live without them, but the other way around, no matter what they actually say. So you may ask yourself what you should do with the humans around you. I’ll share some of my experience with you.

First of all, it is a pleasure to watch them fooling around us. They feel the need to talk with us in a funny way. More, whenever we start wheeking they think we are awesomely cute and they are able to spend minutes looking at us. I even saw the human female watching us while sleeping and I also have the proof – lots and lots of pictures. Awkward! It’s like having a TV with free Human Planet…

Then, they are always useful when it comes to food. I could definitely go by myself to the supermarket and get as many vegetables as I could eat and not paying a thing. (I’m not talking about stealing, but I’m so cute I’m positive no one will ever ask me to pay for my food.) But it’s easier to stay home, sleep, and wait for the food to come to you. Especially when I decide upon the menu. And it is always funny to imagine how the other humans are looking at your human in the metro because he/she has some celery getting out of the backpack.

Let’s not forget about our need of having a maid. I’m too busy thinking to have enough time to clean my room. So, I have two humans dealing with this. The human male is in charge of buying and bringing home huge bags of 20 kilos of sawdust and the human female needs to refresh our habitat every evening.

Also, if we wouldn’t have humans around, there won’t be any couches or beds with pillows and blankets to pee and poo on. It is amazing how funny it is to run around, find a place in the blanket and do your “job” there. Even more amazing is the fact that we are allowed to do it, but other humans not.

So, my dear furry friend, control well your human(s) and don’t forget: you can live without them for sure, but life is funnier and easier with them around. 😀

guinea_pig_tales_kirk_anorak(Written by Kirk while sharing an anorak with the human male.)